MY NEIGHBOR’S DAUGHTER

(A comic Nigerian tale)

My name is Onochie,I am the kind of guy that you call a chronic womanizer; are you surprised at this? In Fact I boast of my s*xual and woing prowess before who cared to listen.

But they said everyday is for the thief and one for the owner of the house.And that owner of the house happened to come at such a sumptuous time of the year.

Before I tell my tale,it will be informative to understand the level of my gimrick and subtleties. I am absolutely handsome with nothing somely in my pocket. Thus,any lady Igl got within my caprice stands to lose at both ends... nothing like love exists in my dictionary and dick'ever.

I was posted for my National youth service at Port Harcourt,Rivers State in 2018. I woke up as usual and went to fetch water from the next neighbor's tap,there I met a young girl of 22 on a black singlet... stretched down to her half thigh.

"Goddammit !" I licked my lips and mumbled in excitation.

The concept of introspection is not for me, I quickly willed to trap the Chick, believe me she has all you can desire in a teen. I quickly drew closer to the tap, and offered to lift the bucket for her. Don't envisage a good gesture,I have my own plan. I used the opportunity to survey her boo'bs... gracious! I wondered how God decided to adore some creatures at the expense of others. Look at you reading this,you can't match the fullness of her ovally shaped Mama's gland.

"Thank you sir" she said after my offer.

" Is nothing dear. I am Onochie by name and sorry, I wouldn't mind wasting your time. Can I have your digit ?" I cleverly beckoned whilst creating phonetic narratives.

"Pardon, " She said and began to walk away.

I smiled. Can she resist the handsome young man before her? I have seen her likes and such initial gragra are nothing new to me. I quickly followed her praising her endowment and not forgetting to throw a tease. I got her laughing and that was the first hit.

"Igbo man, you're really funny. What do you want from me?"

That question alone ignited a sensation in-between my groin,I quickly held the Adam within my groin, still it insisted on pushing its head through the grib. Nothing ran through my mind except a bedeviling idea and plan...plan of devour and escapades.

"Just your number angel" I muttered amidst a curl of smiles hanging on my lips,while I brushed my dark beard.

"Okay,you can have it,but...I am stubborn o and better know say if e enter,e don enter o "

I didn't have patience to understand or subsequently think about the profile she dropped. I answered in affirmative and accepted every condition and terms whatsoever.

I went home feeling fulfilled and like a conqueror, odogwu.

The two days of woing wasn't easy, damnit ! Then I knew I was actually dealing with an underaged; a girl whose sense of understanding is poorer than her matured body. But Las Las she agreed to visit.

The day she walked into our compound,I watched through my window how mouth gaped and abact my neighbors were. Of course they must have known her and I later learnt that she's a hard to get girl in that street,her father has a double barrel,ready for a shot'.

"Shot ?" I questioned with widened eyes and mouth open. But that also didn't communicate a signal to my poor mind.

She was surprised to see a corpa cap hung on a nail in the wall. She seemed happy and praised me for being not only handsome,but also educated. There she expressed her desire to study political science in Uniport. I seized the opportunity and promised to be conducting a private lesson for her since my course of study sociology has a related scientific method with her aspiration. That was another hit—second !.

After a few minutes of discussion and narratives,my body wasn't with me. I began to salivate and mouth-watered each time she stood up to walk or look around the room. The worst was that she came prepared to tempt me in a tightened slipy and flowered embroidered gown,not just far fetched from half her thighs—which revealed the most seductive shape and cleavage. My mind got dirty,and gradually I began to approach my end.

Her name is Nathasha. And during the course of our discussion, I discovered she had mixed reactions and constantly seemed confused in every point. I waved that off, probably it might be because she's new and we are still strangers.

Like a lion in the den of hunger, I couldn't withstand the torment,I reaped up and grabbed her from the back. There she turned abruptly and stared at me in bewilderment.

"What's that ,what are you doing? "

I smiled over that,I knew that must be a prank and of course that's women for you. But I apologized and took a few steps back. She smiled and apologized for being offensive and held my shirt,and slowly drew me closer to her.

" I like you Onochie but I am afraid if you can handle my personality" She mumbled,and drew a fold of flesh around her forehead and a dimple making a beauty on her cheeks... Damn the ebony beauty.

That was another signal and how would I be able to catch up when my dike na dimgba were in control of my every sense.

At that point,I was far from the wisdom of Solomon.

"That's not an issue,I have told you darling,my angel,I can and am capable of making you happy '' That was the nonsense' that came out of my mouth that actually bought a coffin for my burial all the way from Aladimma mortuary.

She smiled so seductively,each side of her lip's creating a tiny fold and the lid of her eyes closing in subsequence. I bet I got the third hit—the one that paid for the ambulance at Rumuokoro and heading to Nkpolu.

At a point I found myself weak,that wasn't me. In such an instant,I should have sent a moist making a sensation around her flap'. Pardon my use of words,but you can't match your morality with my waywardness'.

Rather,she was the one that threw her arms around me and breasted my lips with hers.Moistened with her kiss,she looked at me ardently... smiling,she used a tip of her finger to send me staggering and eventually fell on my bed. Her steps towards me gladdened my heart,she walked seductively,with her eyes narrowed like a movie star in a bid to seduce a man,smiles still hung on her lips and her hands rubbing her body in slow sensation. She jumped on top of me and whispered something deceptive.

"If you really like me,can I get it raw and hard?"

I knew about Lilith the demon' in charge of seducing men and laying with them,and the power of incubi and her succubus half made.But I have vowed to thread where the Angels fear to walk,either a human or a witch' I can't stand to resist this. I tried pretentiously to protest the idea of going unprotected,which got her moody.

"Are you clean,I mean safe?" I asked stupidly' and watched her nod like agama lizard. " Okay then" I replied and smiled mischievously.

She hastily pulled off and threw her clothes round the room. Just as she was about removing her bra,she stopped, looked at me and jolted up and out of my body. She looked confused and thrown in despair. Her mush appeared treachery. I slowly pulled myself and drew back to the wall,rested my back and calmly watched and wondered what might be her sudden change of mood.

She stood up, dressed and bid me farewell while I begged her to explain what got her angry or possibly sit to have some time with me. Just before she got to the door,she turned,the countenance had changed and I could see some signs of depression in her face. She rushed to me , hugged and gave a deep sensational kiss and promised to see me the next day on Saturday. She had a vigil to attend in a nearby Rumuosi and definitely will spend the night with me. That softened my heart,I smiled mischievously and landed on my bed immediately after she left.

"Adim bad ! " I congratulated myself and rushed to fetch a can of Star in my wardrobe.

I left my room and met two of my neighbors sitting in front of their apartments,the female one was smiling mischievously,while the guy winked and laughed loudly. He surveyed the compound and signaled me to draw closer.

"Corpa,you chop am o.i see as she leaped out of the compound. She seemed exhausted. Nwoke Igbo,una dey Sabi do o "

I adjusted my shoulder, smiling and shoved my hands in my pockets, trying to accept the praise.

"The guy na fine Bobo na,small girls go dey die for am. But you go open eyes make them no give you disease" The girl chipped in.

"Aar,na corpa him be na. Shey them dey dash them carton of condom for camp ni ?" The guy retorted.

I had to change the topic,it is enough for me to keep my shoulder high before they expose the masquerade.

On that Saturday,I hastily prepared my room,went to the market and bought enough groceries and some beverages. I took time to cook on time because I would not like to have any delay once she's here. I changed the boxers I wore just in the afternoon,ironed my bed sheet,sprayed strong musk perfume,rub deodorant on my bed sheet,and before I forgot,I fumigated the room two times to avoid complaints.

I knew light would be another problem. I don't trust Power holders just as their name implies, they will withhold light. To this end,I beckoned to a friend just opposite home to lend me his tiger generator he used at the barbing shop for the night—of course I explained what's for and he felt happy helping.

I waited patiently and refused to sit on my arranged bed,I rather sit on the bare floor or on the plastic chair. 7;30p.m, there was no sign of her. Haba ! , Which time do they attend vigil again? I mused and felt irritated.

Just at the minute I was about to give up,I heard a knock at my door. I jolted up and fiam I saw myself turning the door handle. She dashed in like an antelope in pursuit by a lion... breathing profusely. I cuddled her and led her to the bed.

"What will I offer you?" I asked without waiting for her to settle.

" Nothing for now, just want you beside me" She replied and smiled.

My plan was to eat with her before anything,and I was strongly famished. There was light however, I jumped on the bed and sat beside her while she dropped her head on my shoulder. Just like one thing leads to one thing in ladies' narratives,I found myself pushing the Adams in the garden of Eve. Second round left me staggering to the kitchen,I nearly collapsed before I could dish out the rice I prepared with my whole heart.

I didn't sleep that night... chineke. I had to ask her where she's from and to my surprise; she's from Calabar. There and then I knew I had bought a market for myself. 2;00 am—I was in the seventh round and seventh sea. I ate four times before dawn and in the last round,the son of Adam had no more energy to continue the ministry.I was pushed off from the ministry.

I thought I had seen a free woman.I spent every day enjoying a nice meal she prepared and still enjoy the one she has. Then on the fifth day,she suddenly pushed me off her body,I was surprised.

" Why are you violent, Nathasha?" I quizzed

"This is Nat and not Thasha?* She blurted.

I was confused and kept staring at her like a moron. Maybe,I mused... maybe my trap has caught a rat.

" What did you mean by that, what's the difference?" I asked.

"Didn't she tell you? I wonder why Thasha had to throw herself to every man she sees and at the end jeopardize our Co existence" She mumbled and galavant.

"You mean,I don't understand" I muttered and scratched my head in confusion.

Her attitude at this point was strange, absolutely matured and each word delivered with polished English unlike the usual Pidgin.

"I will drop a letter for her,she will explain next time she meets you" She said and left the door ajar as she dashed out in fury.

My mind didn't calculate it well, either because there was no basis to give a clue to what's happening or because I was in a dilemma.I then wondered;was she a twin and if she was,why would she allow me in the first instant to have an affair the same day before she got furious. That sent a bang of goose making waves through my spine.

Same evening, I had to stopped a friend I have met her along with and inquire about the sudden attitude of Nathasha, though I tried concealing our sexual' affair. The girl seemed to be on a cover,but hesitated and told me to check on factors and signs that could trigger such in people. I was confused and related my bemusement to her.

"I thought you are educated,why not study and don't involve me in whatever you dig out" She said and walked away.

I stood transfixed and watched her leave. I quickly brought out my phone and hastened to my phone browser. My head spinned,I could sense a rump of blood forming around my forehead, while my heart beat in quick acceleration...forcing itself through my diaphragm,I could hear it beat. My hands were shivering,sweats rallied round my face and I felt weak on my knees.I quickly shoved the phone back to my pocket and ran home.

I first took a sachet of cold water and then sat down to continue my research.

"She has two personalities in one body? " I mumbled in shattered amazement.

The outcome of the research showed she had Dissociative Identity disorder,a type of Psychological disorder where a victim has two personality with different likes,desires,temperament and vision.The personality is usually the result of sexual or physical abuse during childhood. Sometimes it develops in response to a natural disaster or other traumatic events like combat. The disorder is a way for someone to distance or detach themselves from trauma.

I called her the next day,but she didn't pick either and didn't return the call. I was bothered and afraid. I haven't seen such before and beneath my groin,I could feel the pain from the constant inserting and washing that have left injuries on my Adam. I felt so restless and fear increased when I remembered Nat told me Thasha threw herself to every man,like every man just like she did to me without protection.

I had to take a HIV test that evening,and was advised to check back a few months later. That got me unsettled, should I wait for more months if I have contracted the virus ?. I requested for any medication from the laboratist to halt it in case. But I was left with no option. This is the biggest and the height of suspense I have ever felt in my life since I took this womanizing mantle. That night I prayed fervently to God,once the test shows negative that I will surely join the evangelism ministry in my church.

The second day,I couldn't sleep well that night and was able to have a short sleep around 4a.m. I was woken by a bang at my door. I sprung up frightened and rushed towards the door. On a second thought,I withdrew back and peeped through my window to survey the outside. It seemed nobody was at home.I checked my wrist watch—8;35a.m,it was obvious people had gone out. I heard murmurs at the door and then a heavy bang. There's no hiding place for the wicked,I said to myself and said the last prayer before I opened the door.

The last I saw before I slumped was a double barrel,Nat or Thasha beside a man and two well equipped police men in uniform and guns. The slap from the man with the double barrel sent stars chasing each other in my eyes. Be it however, another slap and a kick revived me and I was ordered to dress up and follow them to the stations.

"Which station?" I asked, looking sheepishly at Nat-hasha.

The kick that followed the question sent me staggering. I quickly without further curiosity and enquiry to prepare for the unknown. On the way,I was able to drop a message to a kinship in the town.

At the station,I was dragged into the cell pending when the Divisional police officer will report to duty. That was the day I knew and understood the slogan "smell rod". Just immediately I was pushed inside the tiny cell with a tiny window at the top,I turned, placed my nose on the bare rod protecting the entrance and stared grossly at the free world. I thank God the inmates weren't hostile,they were busy asking why a fine boy like me should be here to receive mosquito bite...if I killed my girlfriend. I told them nay,but had a sexual' affair with the Lucifer's daughter. That threw them into a boisterous laughter. I had to force myself to laugh as well,but that didn't seem funny to me.

Around 11;a.m, I heard my name from where I squatted. Hunger wasn't my problem. I rushed and embraced the rod again.

"You too like to smell this rod orori buluku. Corpa wey no get sense. Come out,come answer query ogbeni" A female police officer lashed, looking exactly like ape.

I followed her to an office where I met Na-Thasha,the man with the barrel,and an officer on the table. I instantly believed he must be the D.P.O. The man with the barrel stole a glance at me,I nearly lost my spirit,I saw a rage and eagerness to draw blood.

" I heard you're a serving Corp member?" The D.P.O asked. It seemed he spoke with uneasiness,with his lips clinging in-between his teeth.

"Yes sir" I answered, whilst my leg was shaking .

The man who was with a barrel who later identified himself as Na-Thasha father explained with the nodding support of her daughter how I ruined her into my house, bewitched her and rape her on several occasions with the promise to help her with private lessons. I was bemused, transfixed and dumbfounded. They presented evidence from Na-Thasha's phone which was shown to me. In her chat history,I discovered that many chats, especially where she professed her love and informed about her willingly visits, were deleted, leaving more of my messages with clear evidence of stalking and vows to do this and that.

I protested vehemently,I told my own side of the story and demanded that my phone be fetched from the police custody to justerpose the allegation. Hell was let loose on my head,I scrolled through my chat and to my dismay,just like in her own WhatsApp chat history,mine was deleted and appears the same as hers—no wonder she has been with my phone all through the last day,I thought she was playing a game with it. I threw myself to the ground and called my God to take me before the law punished and disgrace me. I refused to heed to the order of the D.P.O to stand up after he had gone through My chat. One question from him after I had protested restored me.

"Your claim might be right, young man, you're in the police station where investigations reveal truths and lies. It will be to your own interest to cooperate with me. Tell me, do you have an evidence contrally to what's on this present chat history?"

At this question,I sprung up from the floor,took my phone from him and searched for two contacts on my phone. I showed him the first contact, where I was telling a co womanizer about my new catch; the screenshots and voice notes Na-Thasha had sent. The second contact showed the pictures,chat screenshots and pictures we snapped together in my room smiling after an escapade. After her father had seen all these,he looked at me and sighed.

Just as I was about to leave the station with the kinsman who came to bail me after receiving my message,I heard my name and turned to behold Na-Thasha. I was enraged and had the urge to strangle her.

"Hey,this is Thasha. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier about my personality and I didn't know it would get to this".She paused and stared at me for a reaction.Seeing I wasn't ready for a banter. She continued. " I normally quarrel with Nat,my childhood imaginary friend I created in my mind. She grew stronger than me and was always trying to suppress me. She hates seeing me around men,I mean she's a lesbian',a jealous type indeed.we normally communicate through writing and she has expressed her dislike of you and warned to destroy you if I failed to keep off from you. Everything that just happened was all her cause,and I have been suppressed since yesterday till a few minutes ago my dad had to send me out to have a time with the D.P.O".

"And what about throwing yourself at every man?" I asked curiously.

" There's nothing a jealous woman cannot say to send her message home or haven't you heard that the jealousy of a woman is more dangerous than the venom of a serpent?"

" William Shakespeare,I know " I responded and took a deep breath.

" Please don't leave me,we can be just friends instead ,if you are that afraid to find trust in me. And since you're educated, please…" She paused and brought out a paper and pen and wrote on it and handed it over to me.

I read it as " help and save me from her. We hear each other but can't read what the other has on a paper". I fondled the paper,stared at her and for a few seconds we were mute. I finally smiled.

" I will do research and consultations on that and get back to you" I promised and walked away beating my chest to never have anything to do with her again.

" Hey bastard"

I turned,she was still standing there and looking malevolent.

" I will deal with you," She blurted.

"Nat, you're a coward and I promise to save Thasha from your treachery" I retorted and walked away with my freedom.

© Mmadu Stanley.